i hate that i dont write much anymore
my typing fingers are sore from talking with my new friend but 24/7
it is so nice to have a new friend and feel this close to them
it also keep me busy when i dont see jim....

jim and i are doing well, saw him this weekend.
i like to say that i think i am getting nearer to the next step
there is no certain thing that has happened it is just a comfort between us and the way that he speaks to me sounds very positive and assured.
i feel very good with him and very comfortable

work is work.... hate to be there, wish i was elsewhere, but i know what i need to do :)

mom is doing well these days, thank god. i dont know that i could handle anything happening to her, not now in my life.

miss writing here
but i dont have any drama these days
this is a good thing

so i am totally ignoring my blog lately... i have been completely caught up in facebook, it is, as they say.... A HUGE BLACK HOLE.... you get on there and you are there for what seems like days....
but i have connected with some friends from the past and made one really great friend in the process.
i love my circle of friends... you know who you are.... i dont think i could have made it thru the last year with out you all.
the support that you gave me when i was falling apart at the seems. and the companionship you gave me when i was alone... and the support and love you give me now... you are all amazing!

i have not seen jim for a week, miss him... heeelloooo....
but whatever, i will see him when i see him. it is not like i dont have anything to keep me busy, between keeping up with my emails and josh and his band and work and just daily life... i am good over here.
a friend told me that i should enjoy my time alone, when i am not with him and i am certainly trying to do that.

more snow this weekend, i want to scream... it is so freaking cold out right now i cant even stand it!!!

so just some updates.... gloria, i am assuming GF is you... if so, that needle punch is soooo easy and fast and calming, bad part... the kits cost like $10, have to find a source online on the cheap.... we need to get together soon... juno and wine i say!!

totally enjoying my new BFFF burt!!

sally, i think about you all the time, i hope you have a great trip where ever you are going... i hope to catch up with you soon ... we have not had a good talk in forever.... i have a vaca in feb... maybe we can get up to the cape then for a day or two.

capecodkitty, if i get up there in feb i want to stop and see you too! would love to meet you in person :)

patrick, i have not thanked you lately for all the company and the assorted drinks here and there... so THANK YOU....

jean... there are not enough words... you are THE BEST! just wanted to tell you that since it is not something i say often :)

ok i got all that off my chest... of to write more emails and get sucked into facebook :)

above ... my needle punch ... finished...... and a pic of the boys.... trey, ray, and josh

well jim is alive but i think he is going thru something this weekend and i just wish that i could be there for him.

it was a weird weekend that is for sure.
glad to have josh back home, he faired well in the snow. but i was cold!!!

we went to band practice and met the new drummer and he is so cute and a good drummer for 11 years old. they play out for the first time next saturday night at 6:00 at the hanon hatch vfw post in west hartford ct.... looking forward to it.

work tomorrow, not in the mood....

i have typed so much this weekend, more than i have ever typed in my life i think.

i think i will try to get some sleep early tonight since i dont think i will hear from jim

i could use some extra sleep.... 5:15 comes early for the gym.

wish it was jim not gym... ha!

i finished my need punch kit and now need to frame it. i love the colors and it was so easy to do and it looks so much like rich terrycloth, i think that is why i like it.

still feeling weird
have not heard from jim since late yesterday afternoon
he was busy and i am sure very tired but i go vm again today... so naturally because of the storm i wonder if he is ok
maybe lost phone in snow bank
or lost power and cant charge the phone....
either way, miss him

josh is going to be dropped off very shortly and we will make lunch and chat for a while about his weekend camping in the snow storm. i am sure he had fun.

have not spoken many words this weekend but sure have typed them. been emailing and texting friends alot this weekend... thank god too cause you know me, i would be brooding in a corner being along all weekend like this.
i will survive.

going to stafford to practice with the band today (josh not me) i enjoy watching them work on songs. it is so interesting to have them teach each other with out sheet music in front of them, they do it all by ear.
fun stuff.

writing again today
bored
dont want a storm
dont want to be stuck in the house
dont feel like doing anything.

went to the mall and got some stuff with the rest of my gift certificates
got some business casual pants because this trip to colorado is business casual and i dont have alot of that, i have alot of casual....
hence the pants buying today

on my second glass of wine... it's gonna be a long long night :)

up early to bring josh camping
it is 15 degrees right now... they are crazy.... and it is supposed to snow....
just came back and am going to try to get more zzzz's.... but it probably wont work, once i am up... i am up.
i have two days ahead of me with no real plan
i hope to see jim but i have no idea if it is even in the cards.
going to call the vet to see if i can get keesha my million year old dog in today... her nose is so dry and she drinks a bowl of water every day and her back legs are in bad shape too.
going to do some errands before the snow comes and i bought another needle punch kit to keep me busy while i sit here on my own for hours and hours.
actually it would not be the end of the world to just sit and relax... i have not done much of that lately
work has kept me busy and it is going well.... i have been crafting in all my spare time. housework fills a good portion of time too.... my batheroom needs to be sandblasted... i say that to myself every time i walk by it.
and i have been emailing and texting network of people quite a bit lately too, from jim and jean and patrick to facebook friends
so i suppose it would not be the end of the world to just go to bed early tonight if i cant see jim.

so here i sit waiting for something to happen or something to do
i am in an odd place
not a bad one by any means
just odd
got another needle punch kit to work on tomorrow during the storm if i am not able to see jim and i am trapped inside
josh is camping in the snow storm in three sided shelters
he will have a blast i am sure
he loves to camp with the scouts

i was going to be able to sleep late tomorrow but since he is leaving tomorrow at 6:30AM instead of 6:30PM tonight... my plans are foiled again
i will sleep in on sunday
actually i might just jump back in bed tomorrow after i drop him off, it could happen....

hoping to see jim tomorrow because sunday is a bit busy again.... but i probably wont be able to.... that is usually how it works out.... but i can feel it getting closer... the introduction.
i went over last night to bring him the quilt and pillow i made for him
he LOVED it
he couldnt stop smiling and laughing, thinking how crazy i was to make those for him.
his daughter saw it today and asked where he got it and he said his friend gave it to him,..... i am officially mentioned maybe for the first time.... who knows.... HA!

anyway, like i always say, as long as he keeps making time for me and treating me kind and paying attention to me.... i am fine with waiting.

i am in a really good place today, even tho my neighbors are making so much noise i want to choke them!!!
work is going really well
jim and i are going really well
my house is a mess but i dont care!
i have been crafty and i like it
i am making new/old friends on facebook

going to go downstairs and have a glass of wine and work on my new craft (needle punch)
i am loving it, very addictive.

well all's well that ends well.... so far with the blood pressure.
my blood work came back great. my cholesterol is really low and my triglycerides (i know i spelled that wrong) are really low too. i have no danger of being diabetic at this time and even tho i have not lost weight or inches around my waist my pressure is more 'normal' for me 130 over 88. i am always pushing it a bit high, but never as bad as it was a few months ago.
i really credit working out to this result at the docs today. i have done 20 minutes a day on the elliptical machine every day since the day before thanksgiving... only missing 7 days total.
one huge puddle, one snow day, one really sick day and the other 4 were this past weekend, i just took a vacation from it, but i am back at it as of yesterday.

he also credits my atkins diet to the good blood numbers, said that the lack of carbs helps.

so.... NO DAILY MEDS FOR ME YET!! YAY!!

i go back in april to recheck and by then i hope to have lost the extra chub i gained at xmas (thanks to jim giving me godiva chocolates, they are finally gone now :)

finished the lap quilts, did one for josh too, he is sleeping with it as we speak... and i made a small pillow to match jims because i had extra squares. cant wait to give it to him :)

picked up some yarn and a crochet hook as well as a needle punch kit, something new i have not tried yet. will let you know how it turns out. i like keeping myself busy with crafts, i forgot how much i used to like doing it. i still have my jewelry but that is more like a job since i have to make it to make money... this stuff is relaxing and i can make things for other people, not just women ....
well, i will try to go to sleep now.
wish me luck.

i dont wanna go to work tomorrow, dont make me!!!
oh well, i know i have to.... but for the record I DONT WANT TO!

going to try to get some sleep and going to try to get up early to go to the gym... have not done it in about 4 days.... need to get back on that right away.
i have my follow up apt on tues for my blood pressure
i know i have not lost any weight or inches around my waist so i will probably be put on daily medication for bp. i hope not but i think it is inevitable.

i really hope i can get to sleep soon.... very tired but not physically.... just mentally run down.
i am almost finished with the lap quilt, just have to trim the stray threads and it will be ready to give to him.... looking forward to it.

got the 'batting' and back for the quilt today, the batting is actually drapery lining which is like thick flannel and the back is going to be flannel so the whole thing should be very soft and light weight as well as warm. hope to finish it up tomorrow or the next day.
told jim i was working on a project and it was for him and it has nothing to do with the computer or paper.. he is stumped :)
spent an odd day dong lots of odd things... but got to have a nice visit with jean and gene today.... thanks for the chili and wine :) it was yummy.
went to a night time movie with josh, i NEVER go to nightime movies... we saw 'bedtime stories' it was a cute movie.
going to bring josh to jam with trey tomorrow again in stafford.... and i have to teach the confirmation class tomorrow too.... making the prayer beads with the kids... i hope they like them and i hope it is not a fiasco either.
i am up too late again but not tired at all..... going to try to get some sleep but not sure if it will work....

ok so this is what i have been up to today
i named this picture 'quiltone' like there might be a quilttwo or quiltthree in my life somewhere down the line.... this one tuckered me out and i still have to do the batting and backing and then do the actual quilting.... maybe tomorrow.
probably will give it to jim... it is a lap quilt so it is not huge.
pretty good for working from memory..... and not using any pins... i have an aversion to pinning things... it gets on my nerves.

my car is fixed, it was the thermostat and because they just replaced it 3 weeks ago, it was free today... yay!

going to try to go to bed now....

starting the day on a good note, even tho my car is in the shop
jim called me to come see him last night and i was able to spend the night.... when i left my car was overheating and i dropped it off at the shop.... waiting now for results and info, but i dont even care cause i got to see him twice in the last 24 hours. yay!
had a nice visit yesterday with jean and gene and the gang, nice visit with patrick too (thanks for the beer) and nice evening alone and then nice night with jim... really cant complain today.

i am in a good place right now... thinking of walking over to the gym, or showering and getting ready for the day or starting a project... i like the choices!

it was pointed out to me today by a good friend that i dont blog as much as i used to
my reply was that i guess i dont need it as much as i used to
i mean, i used to blog more than once a day on the bad days
i am grateful those bad days have passed.
but i still need to vent and still need this outlet.
my grouchy-ness is passing
i bought a bit more supplies for the prayer beads and mad another set tonight. i hope the kids like making them
i have some missing beads, and i have looked everywhere.... and cannot find them. and honestly there are not alot of places to look in this little apartment.... some hematite crosses that i did not like the bales on so i put them aside, and a whole bag of wooden beads... have NO IDEA where they are.... dammit!
also bought a bunch of fabric squares special for quilting.... going to drag the machine out tomorrow and if i can remember how to thread the damn thing am going to mess around with lap quilts. i used to like making them, they are quicker than a huge quilt, give satisfaction when making them and giving them. and it is a good winter thing to do.

went off the diet again today but after the 2nd peanut butter cookie, damn they were good, thanks gene!! i just gave up at that point. didnt do too much worse the rest of the day but still i was off track.
didnt work out today either, but that was because i got an impromptu phone call from jim this morning at 7:30 telling me that his daughter was going shopping with a friend for a few hours and i could come by if i was able to.... and you know i did!
it was great to spend a few hours quality time with him.... hope to see him again before the weekend is out.

ok .... up too late so i am going to get some sleep now... i hope.