so i feel like throwing up today and it is not from the wine at the party
this is what i am thinking is going to happen, and it is a sinking feeling

i think jim is going to break up with me today because he will say that he does not
have time to see me enough to keep me happy... or something like that.

i just have this feeling that is going to happen, and it makes me very very sad

i feel this because after we spoke at 2 yesterday when he told me he could not get a sitter, i called at 4:30 and around 6 and around 8:30..... tried the office first which was not switched to the cell and then tried the cell which went to vm each time.

sure the other explanation could be that his phone died while he was out and he did not get the missed calls or the messages until too late or this morning and he could call me today and everything will be fine.....
my explanation is he was screening the calls and did not want to deal with me

yes, i know this is my doomsday attitude and it is bringing me down, but i cant tell you how i feel right now, it just feels like doomsday to me.
i have to get ready for church and then do my mom's shopping afterward.... i am sure i will be checking my phone alot until he calls.,....
the way we left it was that he was going to make it happen for today... somehow....

we shall see.