too much in my head

today i think i will just ramble.... just came home from a long scout meeting.... need a rest.... need a nap :)
need to spend time with my new man..... hope that this turmoil with his job ends this week.... big weekend coming up with scout commitments.... yay, cant wait.... can you hear the sarcasm in my voice.
i am worried about my mothers surgery, so many older people go in for surgery and never come out, or dont come out the same..... she is my only mom, sure, but she is also my friend and i would hate to loose her..... i know i can be grumpy sometimes but she is always there for me.....

i am missing affection.... need some affection from this new man in my life..... first week was great and then his job messed him all up and now we cant even plan a day together.... maybe this weekend..... last weekend he was in chicago and the weekend before that he hurt his back..... i am hoping for this weekend..... i have cancelled my memberships with the dating services.... they wont actually end until 7-29 but the cancellation has been made.... i did this because i think scott is someone i want to spend lots of time with..... he can be very depressed sometimes by this situation.... and i hope that this passes as soon as the job is no longer there causing him stress and pain in his life.
i just need the affection, the attention, you know.... the good stuff......

josh got his progress report and i need to touch base with the english and social studies teachers to see how he is really doing..... i decided to put the balance of the summer CTY program on my credit card .... decided that the good that will come from him being away from home with a bunch of other smart kids learning about something he really likes out weighs the money on my credit card..... might try to have the money taken from his restricted account but i have to send a letter to the probate court and have it approved.... i also put in an appeal asking for more money toward the scholarship as well from johns hopkins..... i hope it all pans out well for me....

work is a drag.... i cant seem to get into anything there..... everything is a bother to me.... too much on my mind in my personal life.... i will feel better when this weekend is over and i have been able to spend some time with scott.... i will feel better when the 28th comes and goes without a hitch with my mom's surgery....
i just cant concentrate on anything..... too much in my head....