all around the world, huh? who knew!

ok so cause i have no life i am writing AGAIN today
maybe i wont write in the morning.... ha! yeah i will

anyway, i was looking at my site counter information that i have and it seems that people have read my blog from the us, uk, italy, romania and canada
in the us i have states like washington, cali, oregon, mass, ny and ct
in ct i have several towns mainly in the center of the state

i would love to hear from anyone who reads regularly
i know my 6 or 7 people who read this like it is their guilty pleasure... you know who i am talking about :)
but i would love to know anyone else who either thinks i am crazy or hilarious or just a hopeless soul.... or any other interesting adjectives.... that is the right word.... adjectives?? i suck at grammar.... and spelling.... and punctuation.... and capitalization....
anyway, it is pretty cool to know that people are reading this and some of them come back more than once. i sit here and write my little heart out, it is the way i purge feelings and share with (whoever is listening) what is going on in my crazy little life here in windsor ct.

so please comment if you can, if you click on comments at the bottom of the post it should talk you thru getting a sign on if you dont already have one.

so today i got to spend some time with laurel, she always grounds me, snaps me out of it when i am in a funk. i like to talk to her about josh too because she raised two boys so she knows my pain. we ate at vito's by the water in town, it was GREAT.
i had a nice chat with sally too, i am so glad we have become so close these last few years. i am glad to be in her life and i am glad she is in mine.
while i was talking to sally i made a decision that i was going to ceremonially burn the love letter that mother fucker douche bag pete gave me for valentines day.... you remember the one i had framed and then when he dumped me i had to take it down because it made me cry.
now i know he meant every word he said in the letter at the time BUT when i found out that he cheated on me (which is only speculation but i believe it to be true) i decided i needed to get rid of it... and what better way than burning it!! who doesn't love a fire!!!
before burning it i printed the 3 pics i have of the realtor (you know any minute i am going to start calling him by his name on the blog, i mean he has lasted longer than any of the rest of them have.... 5 weeks and counting, i cant really remember how much time i wasted on eeyore, but he was the one that came the closest....)
anyway i printed the 3 pics i have of him and put them in the frame that the letter was in and hung it up.... looks nice.
then i read the letter one more time.... it was GREAT to read it and not cry
then i folded it up and put it in a sauce pan cause i have nothing else that is not flammable that i could move toward the open window so that the smoke alarm would not go off and i lit it and watched it burn. i thought it might be a bit odd to the neybas if i did it out on the sidewalk or my deck....
it was odd, when it was done, there were large sections of the paper that remained whole and you could still see the words but when you blew at them, they just disintegrated. symbolic i think.

i will be so glad when this weekend is over
i know he wont be able to get a sitter because he has not told me he did
i spoke to him for about 8 minutes earlier today and asked him to please call me later and he did not, but i am sure it is because he was too busy and then fell asleep cause that is how he rolls
i will go to the party with josh tomorrow and if i cant see the realtor i will have josh sleep at home tomorrow so i am not so lonely.
susans picnic on monday.... the big b-day.... ugh!
i hate all the excess time on my hands.... i cant bring myself to organize anything or make jewelry or do anything productive really.
i function better with a schedule.
ok i took a pill and i dont feel sleepy at all, dammit.
it is 11 and this is actually early for me lately..... but i am going to try to go to sleep now.
wish me luck.

oh and i went tanning today and i was lying in a different position and my underarms are burned.... OOOWWWW
yea, i am a dumbass.... live and learn.... and then get luvs :)