fri outlook

so today is finally friday.... i cant wait to sleep a little late this weekend on both days... i need to catch up.
again, i worry going into work, and i worry over the weekend that something may happen with my boss' mother..... again i pray she is not in any pain.
sometimes they wait till they have seen everyone that needs to travel and see them... it is odd the way they dont let go until it is time.

so last night, i thought i was going to see patrick and i made him a small rack of ribs because he liked mine so much last week. it takes 2 hours so i knew i would not hear from him for a while, so i made them.... when i talked to him when he got out of work he said he did not feel well, was going to go home and take some medicine and eat something and let me know if he was up for a visitor.... turned out that he was not.
when i asked if he would like to see me tomorrow night (fri) he said that someone asked him to go out for a few beers after work but we could do something after that.... will be until about 7. told him i made him the ribs and he was thankful and asked if he could get them tomorrow... i said sure.

so i am excite to see him and i realllllly hope he does not call me at 7 and tell me he is not feeling well again.
i know he felt bad about not being more awake on wed, and he felt bad about not seeing me last night, said he did not like disappointing me.... but your health is your health and if he is not feeling good again tonight.... then i wont see him till sunday night, if he even wants to see me then....
naturally my head wants to think that 'someone after work' is a woman and he might call me to say he is not feeling well, but really wants to stay out with her.... which is fine and understandable, but i hope it is also completely in my imagination. i hope that the 'someone after work' is guys and i am hoping he really does want to see me tonight.

i am not going to try to get my hopes up, because i hate it when they are dashed.
but i can feel confident that he does like me and i am the only one he is seeing, as far as i know.

online, just watching the way the contacts and icebreakers have died off for me, i am sure they died off for him too. and he has been active at least as long as i have.
the reason he comes up in my top few for 'we match' is because he actually matches what i am looking for... because what he is looking for he did not put much specific... he is looking for a female that does not smoke and does not want kids.... hello, i fit in there :)
but i put more specifics and he matches those for me.

so i go thru the day today and hope that i have a positive outlook. hope that i keep my head up and 'know' that when he calls at 7 he is going to want to see me tonight. why wouldn't he :)
or at least i keep telling myself that......